Earlier last week, I felt like something was off and I just couldn’t put my finger on it. Things were flowing at the office without a hitch. I started back “running” (and walking – keep me honest) with my running club after more than a year of being away. My family and friends were okay. All the bills were paid and I found a housekeeper. And most of all, my hairstylist is moving back to Dallas from Allen this month! Just to name a few things and conditions that gets me all out of whack and discombobulated. Is that a word? I digress. So what could it be I said to myself? I knew a scholarly explanation wouldn’t be the answer.
Then God revealed to me that I’m getting “weary” by what I see and don’t see. For I know as a Christian, we walk by faith and not by sight. But it wasn’t a faith issue necessarily, but a lack of patience. And I believe this is why the following scripture continued to ring in my ear – even before the mystery feeling – “and let us not be weary in well doing for in due season we shall reap if we faint not.” (Galatians 6:9 KJV) That’s how God operates; He goes before you and prepares the way such as placing that scripture in my heart knowing my struggle.
It’s the due season that has been the thorn in my side in an area of my life that I haven’t been as successful: relationships. Yep I said it! Now I can breathe. It’s out there in the atmosphere floating succinctly with the zillions of other relationship-challenged individuals. But don’t get a misunderstanding here, I’m not hopeless by no means. I’m just traveling in an area that I haven’t been able to master so to speak. But, when I look at my love life with “better eyes,” I really haven’t tried.
I confess though, the wait and being still is something I’m light on and pray heavily on this matter to the point I know God is sick of me. I’m laughing out loud. But at the end of the day with confession and supplication comes deliverance and with deliverance is victory! I’m reminded that I have to fight for this victory as I do in other areas of my life such as my career. Love and loving is something I haven’t really paid much attention to even though I’ve been married. Well, I sort of fell into that, but that’s another topic for another day, so stay connected.
Bottom line, I am learning I have to not only invest in a loving relationship and make deposits like I have done with my professional life, but also to hang in there even when I don’t know what’s going to be on the other side. So my prayer now is teach me how to stay in the game and fight to see the victory of love realized.